Have you noticed times where communication seems to fulfill and other times that it seems to drain you? I have. Based on that, I want to define what I mean by ‘meaningful communication’.
There can be cases you actually want make something understood and it is understood (the communicator ought to understand himself yourself first), and there can be cases wherein you’re not understood or you are misunderstood. There can be cases where you don’t really say anything that’s to be understood, and it is not understood or the other person thinks he ought to understand something and that he has understood something, but he hasn’t . And there can be cases wherein you try to make something understood and the receiver pretends to not understand, for reasons he knows, but to sum them up: it hurts his ‘interests’. I mean don’t try going to some mafia godfather and analyse ethics to him… The best it could happen would be for him to go on being the same godfather and bully the (asserted) unethical others.
One way or the other, misunderstanding can get your attention stuck, and you will be recalling it and trying to understand it or make yourself understood from that point on (unless you don’t). And some knowing that also do it on purpose; like when somebody insults you with lies or half-truths –whether he knows he lies or not and you go like ‘why did he call me %$#$$, could it be this or that or…? The constant recalling of many such incidents can lead to confusion and in the end conviction that the insults are true.
I would propose to pay no attention to past misunderstanding, and try to understand the present in present, instead.
I enjoy meaningful communication wherein somebody wants me to understand something and he is also willing to understand something from me in turn. It can be fun and fulfilling to learn from each other, instead of defending ourselves (or group or other things), trying to offend the other (or group or other things), or pretending that we want something, while we want something else. Otherwise it can be a pain.